Our daughter, Tasha, 11, has struggled with the effects of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome since the moment she was born. Tasha is a beautiful girl who we tease lives in a "Butterfly, rainbows, smiling face" world. :) She knows there are bad people and things in the world but she refuses to believe that anything "bad" will happen to her or anyone else. Also, Tasha has a passion for animals like you wouldn't believe! Tasha attends a "special day" school to address her disability and is learning just fine but at a slower pace then other kids her age. With that said, a couple of years ago, Tasha had the opportunity to attend this special day school and had to be pulled out of her regular school near the house and go to another school that had this program a little farther away from the house and away from her other siblings. As a result, Tasha and our family met Connie Thompson, Tasha's teacher. Fortunately for us, with this Special day class, Tasha is able to stay with the same teacher til she goes off to Jr. High - 3 years. Tasha immediately became attached to Mrs. Thompson and she became a close friend of the family.
Mrs. Thompson let us know about 6 months ago that her husband was diagnosed with inoperable cancer. We informed Tasha of this and she struggled to understand but remember, Tasha lives in the "butterfly, rainbow" world and doesn't really understand why people must die. On some days, Tasha would come home from school and let me know that Mrs. Thompson was crying today and was sad. Tasha was feeling the pain herself seeing her teacher cry. Mrs. Thompson continued with the school year, teaching a classroom of educational disability students and continued to care for her husband. What a remarkable woman!!
After the school year, Mrs. Thompson invited Tasha and her sisters over to her house to swim. The girls had a blast and they also informed me that they helped Connie's husband, Mike, bring in the groceries.
As you can see, Tasha and Mrs. Thompson developed a special relationship that continues today.
Yesterday I received a sad email, Mrs. Thompson informed me that her husband, Mike, had died peacefully. My heart felt heavy and my eyes welled up with tears. Just with 2 sentences in an email I could feel the hurt in Connie's heart. How were we going to tell Tasha. Yesterday was Monday and Mark took Tasha to work with him, so I phoned Mark and let him in on the news and asked him how do we tell Tasha. I left that to Mark. He explained the passing of Mrs. Thompson's husband and Tasha just cried. Her first reaction was "How is Mrs. Thompson?" "I want to call her".......Mark and I weren't sure if this was a good idea. Tasha then turned to Mark and said, "I want to take her to lunch! That will fix it!". Mark thought it was a good idea and asked me for the phone number. Mark called ahead and offered our condolences to Mrs. Thompson and explained what Tasha wanted to do. It seemed she didn't hesitate....she wanted to go with Tasha. :) They did go to lunch yesterday and Tasha paid and felt so grown up. I believe in her heart that she felt that that was what was going to help. I explained to Tasha that Mrs. Thompson was going to cry and she didn't have to speak at all to her....just hug her. Immediately on return after their lunch together, Tasha told me over and over again that she did what I said....she just hugged her everytime she cried.
I looked at Tasha and realized that sometimes we have to look at life with child's eyes and see how innocent and honest feelings should be......we as adults try to hide our feelings, try to be strong when inside we are ripping at the seams. Tasha took a sad situation and did to the best of her ability to make things better. Tasha is truly a compassionate person with a heart of gold. Maybe we need to learn a lesson here.....take the time, no matter what, and reach out to a person who is hurting inside and let them know that you are there. Hugs are the best medicine!
